How up-front about not being religious should we be?

I was recently at some friends house in Iowa (I live in Colorado) with my children. These friends happen to be extremely religious and my children and I aren't at all.
Through most of my life, I have tried to be very tolerant and respectful of other's beliefs and opinions. In this case, that meant at dinner, when they prayed, I would stay quiet, though not participate.

This year however, they went to hold hands prior to the prayer. I didn't think much of it and just held hands with the two people on either side of me. But, I noticed my oldest two children refused to do so and one of them gave me an odd look for the fact that I was doing it.

It made me ponder just how tolerant I should be. I've been getting less so because of the changing tide in this country, especially with the Bush Administration. But, with friends. I also noted on this trip that they were willing to give me a book on Christianity that I'm sure they hope will convert me, but I'd be uncomfortable giving them a book trying to break them of their faith.

This is certainly something each of us has to ask ourselves and for me, I've been making a concerted effort to be more upfront about me beliefs, but I also don't see a lot of gain in being argumentative just to argue or with people that aren't really open to it. I tend to be much more willing to let them know what I think without being pushy about it and while being willing to listen to them.

Ask Presidential Candidates

Over the past seven years Humanists have watched as the president and congress have repeatedly breached Thomas Jefferson's wall of separation between church and state. But now you can act to prevent a continuation of this process.

At every opportunity you have, ask the candidates pointed questions on this issue. Or call on your local media to ask such questions. Write letters to the editor expressing church-state concerns. Request that your friends ask such questions. Let's make 2008 the year we begin to set things right as we publicly hold the feet of all presidential candidates to the proverbial fire.

Here are ten questions to draw from or to modify in your own words.

1. Leaders of the religious right often say that America is a "Christian Nation." Do you agree with this statement?

2. Do you think houses of worship should be allowed to endorse political candidates and retain their tax exempt status?

3. Do you think public schools should sponsor school prayer or, as a parent, should this choice be left to me?

4. Would you support a law that mandates teaching creationism in my child's public school science classes?

5. Do you think my pharmacist should be allowed to deny me doctor-prescribed medications based on his or her religious beliefs?

6. Will you respect the rights of those in our diverse communities of faith who deem same-gender marriage to be consistent with their religious creed?

7. Should "faith-based" charities that receive public funds be allowed to discriminate against employees or applicants based on religious beliefs?

8. Do you think one's right to disbelieve in God is protected by the same laws that protect someone else's right to believe?

9. Do you think everyone's religious freedom needs to be protected by what Thomas Jefferson called "a wall of separation" between church and state?

10. What should guide our policies on public health and medical research: science or religion?

These suggested questions were developed by First Freedom First, a joint project of Americans United for Separation of Church and State and the Interfaith Alliance Foundation. First Freedom First is cosponsored by the American Humanist Association and its allies in the community of reason. So we urge you to use one or more of these questions if you attend a Town Hall meeting or another event where candidates for office will be gathering.